The People We Pray To. Who Are Your Saints?

We all have different beliefs about a "higher power."  There's as many deities as there are people if you ask me.  In the rooms of AA we make sure to never instruct anyone on who they should pray to.  We just tell newcomers to pray and as far as I can tell, it works.  We are united in that we really on Faith to stay sober.  But there are some things we all have in common I think.  

When you are alone with yourself do you ever consider those who have passed on?  Do we not all think of the saints in this life that we have known and whether or not they can see the things we do?  I've made decisions in my life that ashamed that some of my loved ones may have seen from a spiritual plane.  I recently dated a widower and the most amazing thing happen.  It cured my atheism.  The one problem I had with completing the steps on AA was step 3, concede and decide to turn our will over to the care of God.  It was something I simply could not do.

I'm a scientist.  A political scientist sure, but I need facts and I research.  This part of my brain I could not shut down.  I thought that religion was for those who where weak and need extra support.  When Jon told me about his late wife, I realized she had a beautiful spirit.... I was spiritual.  I had forgotten about how deeply I believe in the spirit in me and that in others.  This is human; it's what makes us human.  That our spirits exist, and that I knew in my heart Leslie, his late wife, was beautiful.  

I worked step three thoroughly even though I didn't know who or what I was praying to.  I grew spiritually.  I knew I could not help a widower with his family without addressing my God issue.  I was raised with Jon in a church family.  His father, recently passed could perhaps see me too.  The spirits of Jon's father, John and his wife, Leslie moved me to get right with my spirit.  I knew Jon's dad and he was a gentle kind man who sang in our church choir for probably 40 years.  He and she would want me to come into the situation with this broken-hearted family with a spirit that is pure.  

This realization inadvertently got me through step 3 and my sobriety and steps continue.  Now I have peace.  This made me wonder who else do I pray to.  I've come up with a list and I challenge to do the same.  Catholics pray to saints.  Eastern believers pray to ancestors. Whether we realize it our not we converse with those we have lost without having to prescribe dogma or rules.  We knew their spirit.  We feel it sometimes and we make decisions wondering what they think about what we choose.  There are our saints and they are different for every one. 

Janet - My oldest most cherished saint.  My best friend's mother died of cancer when we were 19.  I was with her when she passed.  Her perfect son had been begging her to let go for hours until he gave up and left.  My friend, the black sheep, took her hand.  She spoke to her mom gently and told her it was okay to move on.  Then she did.  Her spirit had to be calm and ready for her to crossover.  It was moving and she has always been my patron saint.  We were teens so Janet had no grandchildren....  But I had a baby at 18.  She got 18 months out of life to enjoy a grandchild.  She was grandmother to my baby so her life could be full.  Since she has been beyond us she now has 6 grandchildren and I think she knows and loves them.  Near them maybe.  She feels near to me and sometimes she is my don't-make-that-poor-choice saint.

Mamaw - My own grandmother what my favorite person alive.  In final days I was struggling with substance abuses. She may have held on longer to make sure I was okay.  I worked at a florist as a delivery driver and I would take bouquets to her.  She always remembered when I came and me but not anyone else.  She survived breast cancer in her 80s.  She waited until I was at least okay to depart.  

Papaw - People don't believe white girls with blond hair and blue eyes are ever really Native American when you tell them that.  Physically, I do have a lot of native features and I got them from my Papaw.  He was a Cherokee Indian and he was not white at all.  I'm Irish and Scottish so the blond and blue, sure but I'm also red and copper.  He was red and copper and not at all a white man.  I had to get him to come to lunch at my school so kids would stop calling me a liar.  I'm 1/4 Cherokee and this spirit is very much a part of me.  My father prayed to the trees when he returned from Viet Nam and although he is a very conservative Christian, he has it too.  I prefer the sun and I do pray to the earth, water, wind and fire.  The elements speak to me some times and I honor them often.  I was my Papaw's Sugarfoot.  In Cherokee culture you are given a name and if you don't grow into it another is chosen that suits you.  I grew into mine. My feet got me through this life.  I'm a dancer.  I have always been a dancer.  I dance everyday still.  He is the saint of my free and wild, dancing spirit.  

Uncle Charlie - My favorite uncle was Charlie.  I felt like I felt him come see me during the moments right after he passed a way.  It was a fleeting moment in the car right after I learned he had died.  I felt his spirit look in on me is what I assume he was doing.  Maybe the idea is fanciful, but it meant something real or imagined to my spirit. 

Miss Beverly - Toady's gram gram.  My youngest child has a step dad we call Toady.  His grandmother had porcelain skin and she ran the dance studio I grew up in.  I took her adult ballet class until she got to old to keep the dance school.  I was never very good at ballet but I was very good at dancing to seduce.  I never did a VIP, pulled any hooker moves; I just danced for over 10 years.  I had a 20 year dancing career total, so it turned out that the girl who wasn't built for ballet was likely one of her most successful students.  I believe she thought my dancing turned out beautiful.  It did.  There is nothing wrong with dancing naked.  More people should do it.  It will liberate your love of your body.  

Gary and Wanda were two adults at my church that I trusted and loved.  They loved me no matter what I went through.  I try to do the right thing for them sometimes too.  

So who influences you?  Who are your saints.  It's worth taking sometime and paying homage to the spirits that guide and teach you.